Au Revoir

In light of Dane's looming departure, he and I are doing this weird dance around each other, a denial dance of sorts, where we smile and try really hard not to look at one another too closely. I suppose it is to be expected....

He threw a good-bye party for himself. After about 1 a..m., the party got crazy and was fantastic, but the house was weird and very off. No more posters on the walls, chotchky on the shelves, album covers covering...well...everything; no more Homies lined up on the door jambs or rows and rows of records and movies. He had me come over earlier in the evening so the shock of the emptiness could hit me before I decided to put make-up on and attempt to celebrate.

He had a great time, and for this I am glad. I had a great time--AW came in from L.A., the downtown folks came out, Dane's Getaway crew, etc. Dane smoked for the first time in 2 weeks, while his girlfriend had a hissy fit over it; some of the ridiculous (but delightful) downtown boys had a jam-session in the sun room that totally rocked; Michael passed out and hit his head (which was really scary, but he later informed me that David was the first thing he saw when he woke up, and that was a good thing. Ha ha!); this guy Jessie had a meltdown and broke his phone before shattering some glass in my friend Alaska's eye (luckily, she is okay); Angela's girlfriend was wasted and made out with everyone in sight; David and Kevin commiserated about the "look" I give when I'm angry (apparently my eyebrow does something impressive??); and liquor, liquor everywhere. Most of us stayed until 4:30 a.m., drinking wine, listening to tunes, and doing exactly what we always do at Dane's. Somehow the noise and swirl of the evening, the press of bodies, delighted hollering, and mass consumption of alcohol padded the distance between Dane and I--made it palpable (despite the uncanny emptiness of the house and what it was we were "celebrating"). Funny how we have to distance ourselves from the distance....

On the way home, it sunk in that that was it...there is no more "Dane's." It also occured to me that I did not take any pictures. And, as you know, I am all about photos. I think I made a subliminal decision: if I didn't document it, it couldn't happen.

We move him up on the 21st. Weird as fuck.